I Still Love My Ex After Destroying Our Relationship
I’ve stopped trying to deny loving my ex
Like the title says, I still love my ex. However, accepting this truth has only been a recent phenomenon. The reality is I denied my feelings for years. Perhaps you can relate?
The revelation came to me after reading a book and then working with a therapist. It has taken time but what I’ve learned is the more you deny something – like a feeling – the more powerful it becomes.
It’s kind of like sticking your finger in a dike. Sure, it works for a while. But eventually, cracks start to form until something gives and the water comes rushing through.
As men, we’re inculcated to break up with women in ways that don’t show our emotions. You know what I mean, right? I’m talking about severing ties and making off like it’s no big deal.
To do otherwise is to break the bro-code; that ridiculous unspoken thing guys do that saves us from losing face. And yep, I’m admitting that I was a master at this.
Now that I’m walking on a path of healing, I’ve discovered that self-compassion is much easier when I don’t lie to myself about past mistakes.